Tristan Wheeler

As the celebrity elites prepare for the biggest night of the year, us average Joes sit on our couches and watch them schmooze it up on the red carpet. Obviously, the only way for us to deal with the jealousy of this celebration of art, industry and opulence is alcohol.

The Pyeongchang Olympic Winter Games opening ceremony is tonight/tomorrow morning at 2:30 a.m., so if you're a keener, wake up and realize that it’s time for you to start caring about bobsledding again.

The goal of the event is to demonstrate that the Pacific Northwest is more than just a training ground for developers, but a place where tech can prosper — and that’s hard to dispute, since nwHacks is the largest event of its kind in western Canada.

Watch as your friends sip beer and down shots, simultaneously relaxing and forgetting the stress of the coming semester. With a blood-alcohol level of 0, you can have a clear head, allowing you to remember that you should be doing readings, you have a quiz next week already and another exam season is on the horizon. Never mind.

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