Why you should vote for CANDIDATE NAME for the non-existent position of VP-AFFAIRS

I will argue that this ‘joke’ is actually an example of high art and social commentary at its finest. Google Sites

We’ve all met our fair share of joke candidates in past AMS, but this one person/group of people/AI bot is a game changer.

This election season, CANDIDATE NAME is running for VP-Affairs — a non-existent position in the AMS — and he is promising to be “a strong voice for students.” The website creators used an AI software to aggregate the content of all the current candidates and create this website, which is equally cool and absolutely terrifying.

While we don’t really know who CANDIDATE NAME is, our best guess is that he has been created by a group of really bored computer science students who know how to use a Markov chain generator, whatever that is, as the creators of the website for CANDIDATE NAME allege. CANDIDATE NAME has a face too, from a person who doesn’t actually exist.

I will argue that this ‘joke’ is actually an example of high-art and social commentary at its finest.

CANDIDATE NAME is advocating for a fall reading break, refining Policy 131, overall transparency and accountability, affordability, mental wellness, sustainability, Indigenous rights and advocacy. While clearly a fake website, this manifesto nails what AMS candidates are all promising.

The ‘Experience’ tab on CANDIDATE NAME's website is also fittingly blank, perhaps a satire of what all will happen with if CANDIDATE NAME is elected.

Lastly, reasons for CANDIDATE NAME to get his own position on campus were spelled out by one of his endorsers, Reddit user u/kinost.

“CANDIDATE NAME has told me that he has no idea what he is doing. In that sense, he’s probably the most honest candidate out of them all. I would definitely vote for CANDIDATE in the VP-AFFAIRS race.”

Do what you will with this information, but maybe it’s time to spend hundreds of dollars from our tuition fees to create a CANDIDATE NAME mural on Main Mall.