A definitive ranking of UBC's washrooms

File Illustration Shavonne Yu

A germaphobe’s biggest downfall is being hyper-aware of the cleanliness of any room — specifically washrooms on campus. Of course, public washrooms are so frequently used that it’s hard to keep them all clean, so I made it my personal duty to find the best washrooms on campus for everyone’s sanity.

Here is a list of my personal experiences with UBC’s various washrooms, graded based on a variety of criteria including lighting, quality of toilets, overall washroom vibe and cleanliness.

Douglas T. Kenny

Grade: F

Without a doubt, the washrooms in Kenny are one of the dirtiest in the nation. I am still suffering from the emotional trauma I received the time I had to go there. I felt like I was trapped in a small cubicle where no one would find me if I suddenly perished from severe constipation.

Geography Building

Grade: C-

I did not enjoy my time in these washrooms — they are old and the smell is horrendous. It’s one of those places where you take one step through the door and just know your time here won’t end well.

Irving K. Barber

Grade: C+

IKB has some of the most popular washrooms on campus — you never know who you will run into there, maybe a childhood friend or your mom? The washrooms are fairly new compared to the other buildings but the cleanliness is a real hit or miss given the frequency at which they’re used.

Earth Sciences Building

Grade: B-

The washrooms here are new, large and have great lighting. They have all the tools to be a great washroom but for some reason, the restrooms are always an absolute mess whenever I’m in there. Sadly, these washrooms have failed to live up to their potential.

Wood

Grade: B

These washrooms are like Vin Diesel — aging, creepy and mediocre at best — but there are many stalls to choose from so odds are one of them will be clean.

Buchanan

Grade: B+

Buchanan D definitely has the cleanest washrooms out of all of the Buchanan buildings. It has 10 stalls and they don’t really have a smell, so your senses are kind of numb, but in a good way.

Swing

Grade: A+

These washrooms should be a tourist attraction — I’ve always loved my time here. They have a real classy vibe and you can choose to go private or public. They are well-kept and in mint condition.