Good morning UBC! Today is the last day of class, which means it’s the day you won’t actually go to class and will probably just drink a lot. Or you’ll go to class and drink a lot. Some people can do it all.
Myself? I’m a fourth-year and my old, withered body probably won’t survive the day. Luckily, my 22 years of life have given me some basic wisdom on how to not party like an idiot, which shows at least that my arts degree has done some good.
We know you’re good folks, but just in case you’re good and drunk folks, here are some reminders on how to party smart.
Mosh the right way
Last time I was at Block Party, me and some other Ubyssey editors were moshing in the centre of the plaza. We noticed a small girl curled up near us who clearly did not want to be there. Luckily our culture editor, Bridget, was smart enough to immediately grab her. We cleared the as fast as we could and brought her to the outer ring to a paramedic.
Mosh pits are awesome, but they’re also really dumb. You’re literally slamming into each other for fun. Take a second to make sure everyone out there wants to be there and pick up anyone who falls down immediately. We know the crowd is always, well, crowded, but clear away fast if someone needs medical attention.
Know your limit
If you’re half as degenerate as we are, you might have a beverage or two before going to Block Party — although remember, you’ll be denied entry if you’re drunk or under the influence. It’s a marathon, not a sprint. Take it slow, stay hydrated and bring some cash for food if you’re Block Party-bound. Yeah, I sound like your mom, but your mom is probably cooler than you.
Be careful
Weed is legal now and stuff, but you might encounter other substances too. We’re not narcs, but we’d advise you to be careful what you take, as a growing number of drugs in Vancouver are laced with fentanyl, a powerful opiate. If you see someone who needs help after taking drugs, find a medic or someone with a Naloxone kit and call 911.
Look out for each other
If your friend is drunk, make sure they have a safe ride home. If someone you don’t know looks really unwell, ask if they’re alright. If someone is being a jerk or a creep in the crowd, point them out to security or find a peaceful way to intervene. UBC shines best when we look out for each other.
Okay, enough advice. Now go have fun, you rascals.
A special shoutout to arts councillor Jerome Goddard for inspiring this list.