The Dingbat

The Dingbat is The Ubyssey’s humour column. We focus on publishing satirical articles relevant to the UBC student’s academic and social experience. If you would like to prove that you're as funny as your friends say you are, put your money where your typing fingers are and submit completed pieces or pitches to Angela O’Donnell at


No longer should young, urban couples have to drag themselves to the Yuletide Martha Piper baptismal fountain every year in order to be given gifts under their own personal The Shadows. It’s just not economical!

Oh, you hadn’t considered how, exactly as Foucault kind of touched on, Wicked exemplifies the neoliberal commodification of the supernatural and how Glinda is the panopticon? Neither had I until I came to this evening’s lecture tipsy just to flex on you first-years who can’t buy alcohol.

I think I felt like that once, excited to walk around in the rain for an hour, huddled on narrow cement walkways while I watched real university students hustle through dirt pathways carved by years of academic feet. But now, in my rain-soaked shoes seven years into my degree I can barely remember my parents.

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