Throw rotting fruit at frat boys for charity

Jack Hauen
author
Published on March 16, 2016
Knock, knock. Who's there? My dad. My dad who? My dad’s a lawyer. Photo courtesy Phi Delta Theta

This Saturday, March 19 at 11 a.m., you can support the ALS Society of BC in the easiest way possible — by purchasing rotting fruit and then throwing it at frat boys.

Phi Delta Theta is hosting the “ALS Triple Crown,” in which registered teams compete in croquet, badminton and bocce ball on Wolfson Field for douchebag rich people sports supremacy. In addition, they’ll be holding what they call the “Phi Pelt” where fruit generously donated by local grocers will be sold by donation and then thrown at active members of the fraternity, including AMS President Aaron Bailey and recent VP External candidate Alex Kilpatrick — “some real notable assholes,” according to Kilpatrick. “Really reprehensible, bottom-tier human beings.”

“ALS is a terrible, degenerative disease. So are we.”

The event will take place on Wolfson East Field on campus. Don’t worry about being able to find them — “We're gonna be the guys in the terrible pastel clothing,” said Kilpatrick.

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[''] Photo courtesy Phi Delta Theta

To register a team, click here.