This person is hard to measure up to: they have a ton of money and a ton of notoriety.
This person, having graduated way back in 1982, was thrust immediately into a fantastic, cushy career as a result of graduating with a degree in their field with honours (rich parents). Now, after contributing nothing to society for 38 years, they decided it was time to make a big change.
They decided it was time to donate $100 from their $7.8-billion net worth to UBC after being called by the UBC fundraiser call centre.
“I really just love to help out,” they said. “I hope my money goes towards something that really matters, like building a really tall apartment building with even taller prices.”
This person’s years of success and upward mobility have earned them much respect and fame. They’ve been frequently criticized for being “aloof,” “a terrible person” and “unable to manage a company.” But they want to change that narrative with this donation, which is the sole generous donation they plan on giving.
And at any moment, they could surprise us and donate another $100 to another place that matters, like a really expensive restaurant chain. How they might surprise us next is anyone’s guess, but at the very least, we know this: this person is important and elite and deserves respect for this.
“I just want to change the narrative,” they said.
“I’m not aloof, I’m not terrible, I’m not mismanaging my parents’ company and driving it into the ground. I’m a good person, just like all the other rich people I know. We just want to do what we do best: help the community.”